VideoGame Recaps.com
Looooooove this site!!! Heh, I've played most of these games, and I must say, the cynical sarcasm they place in their recaps of each game is simply hilarious! (well, despite language and innuendos). Such as:

"A sad little piano solo plays as we fade in on a sunset. There's a pile of weapons on a little hill. There's a ball and a sword, and it looks like the sword is sticking into the ball. I don't think that's good for the ball. There's also a fancy rod, which undoubtedly belongs to the studly hero. Yeah right."

"Then we have our first FMV of the game. [Tidus] suddenly looks Japanese. As in very, very different from his normal gameplay look. Whoops, game designers. I mean, don't get all politically correct on me, people. I'm not saying he shouldn't look Asian, I'm just saying they should have matched up the character designs between regular gameplay and FMVs. For the love of God, they have the technology!" (This was one of Ginny's big complaints, too.)

"A giant tidal wave approaches the city, and red robe guy looks like he's toasting it with his big ol' sake jug. This all has significance. Deep and powerful significance. Okay, I tried to make it all sound cool and epic. Leave me alone."

"[Tidus] falls on his [butt], and Auron sticks a sword in his face. "Take it," he says. Those last two sentences could sound very dirty taken out of context. ..."A gift from Jecht," Auron explains. "My old man?" [Tidus] asks. "No, the other Jecht. The one that hasn't been mentioned ten times already," Auron replies. Oh wait, that was me.

I guess it's handy that Auron just happened to be carrying around this sword that Jecht gave him for ten years. I wonder if it got annoying at some point. I mean, Auron obviously had his own sword to carry around and stuff. I guess he put it the same place that the other 50 extra weapons are stored in RPGs."

"Auron just looks down at him, big sphere of Sin in the background, contemplating whether or not he should step on [Tidus'] hands. At least that's what I would be contemplating." (Amen, Jeanne.)

And there's plenty plenty more. That was just the first page and a half of the FFX recap (there are several other Final Fantasy games, a Zelda one, and a few other random ones), with the best moments yanked out by me. Jeanne is a frickin' riot in these things, and I was seriously gasping for air by page 2, I was laughing so hard. (She also likes Auron, although she rips on him like she does all the other characters. It's all good, though.)

Today's Job Quote
"If it walks, say hi to it. If it talks, upsell it. If it doesn't move, tell it to get to work!"