Strange, that...
You know, last night, I was rolling in happiness. I was also planning to sleep in this morning and I didn't. I woke up far too early.
I don't even remember my dream, but I remember this much.
I'm upset...about something.

And I found a place I hadn't been
I breathed the scents of must
And I looked around in wonder
At the mold and at the dust.

Mold can't be without water
Running down forever there
The rains spring up, fall down
Damps the mold and damps the hair.

What funny ache is this, then?
What dust mold grows in size?
Flame forgotten, flame reborn
Burns the mold and burns the eyes.

And I found a place I hadn't been
And my heart aches once more
And I looked around in wonder
At the mold and at the core

Of the lost problem? Perhaps.
Faces hide behind glass walls
Covered by the mist of time
Empty mold and empty halls.

I...don't know what brought that on. It's not even that great, but I feel a little better for writing it. Mweh.

OB
I've heard from the rumor mill that OB is just getting worse. I've been gone for almost a month now. And I don't miss it. I miss the old OB. But you can't go back. To go back is to regress, to back up, instead of progressing and getting better. I as I am now would not fit there, anyway.

Damnéd Wounds of Time
Ouch, I feel like I opened up an emotional wound. This is really hurting. But I don't want to let myself be dragged down by my own guilt and shame.
...what happened to the happiness I had less than 12 hours ago?
Hurting is a part of getting better, of maturing. So I'm growing. But what is making me grow? What is hurting me?
Something is not right. And I don't know what it is. That's the worst of it.